sometimes i put boogers in my pocket

and not fiona's either. her i make go get a tissue. i must teach her right from gross, right? my point of this is to say that i am all at once incessantly clean and lazy. no way in hell am i gonna throw that booger on the floor or wipe it under a table but i am also not going to get up from my cozy spot to grab a tissue, so in the pocket it goes. sort of for safe keeping until i pass the trash can or some toilet paper. but mostly it stays in the pocket until the washing machine can properly dispose of it. and that's just cuz i honestly forgot about it.

there's a crazy clean side of me that tends to emerge at this time of year, anticipating the big spring cleaning. it's not yet christmas but i feel the need to start taking inventory of what i am going to toss, donate and buy as well as the master plan for cleaning shit top to bottom. fuck you christmas..move on already!! in fact i feel like after christmas all cold weather should just go away. lets just get to the window-opening and bird chirping. i especially feel for you people in the northern climes. i mean farts!!! once that snow starts it just keeps dumping on you. sorry about that, really. at least here in the southeast the winter is relatively short. although in the south there's this evil indian giving thing with the weather...where one day it's 75 degrees and you are all psyched outside doing some much needed yardscaping and then bam! the next day it snows. i think this boils down to retarded weathermen. not global warming. srsly. does everyone out there have dumb as fuck weathermen like they do here in atlanta?

anyway, as i was thinking about all of this cleaning i came to the cleanclusion, you can't REAAALLY clean in a rental..the scary anal german housekeeper with thick rubber gloves that lives inside me wants to move the refrigerator away from the wall and clean under it, behind it and also remove the coils, filters and clean that shit out too. but the lazy renter that i am would rather stick toothpicks in my eyes than clean up after every renter that ever called this place home. so my thoughts turn to moving. when you rent this is not so big a deal. apart from packing shit up and the actual move sucking ass, it's not nearly as crazy as selling and buying and the headaches and heartaches that go with it. unless you're ally. she moves a lot. and i think she actually enjoys it. although i would too if my house buying budget were the same as hers. so that's where i'm at. cleaning like crazy in a house that's not mine or moving to a house that's not mine, cleaning it but not have to move shit around first. do we call that a double edged sword? or is that too dramatic? and this post really did just start as a way to tell you that i put boogers in my pocket, like a four leaf clover, a love letter or a cheap bowling alley vending machine trinket.